This past weekend while meeting with some parents, the conversation and concern of TikTok began. In our time together, I feel like I did not have time to fully express my opinion of how parents should proceed when it comes to this platform of social media.
Before we jump into the rest of this post, I need you to re-read my previous sentence. First, this is my opinion, you can choose to do with it what you will. These are just my thoughts on the platform with the experience I have of it this far. (Which is limited) Second, TikTok is a social media platform. This means that parents should proceed with caution, just as they should with any other social media platform.
Train up a child in the way he should go;
even when he is old he will not depart from it.
-Proverbs 22:6
So the main question is, “Should your teenager be on TikTok?”. If you have not heard of TikTok yet, you will. In fact, it is probably a little too late to be answering this question, because most teens are already using this app. TikTok is not just beginning, it already has over 100 million users, and it is still rapidly growing.
If you are looking at this post to give you a clear answer for or against this app, I apologize because this is not my goal. As the parent you decide when your student is ready to be on social media.
Yes, TikTok has some really rough content, that parents should be cautious of. We should not expect children and teenagers to automatically know how to navigate this content.
We would never put a teenager in a car and hand them the keys, hoping they’ll figure out on their own how to drive. This would only happen when we are confident they have been taught how to handle the vehicle, navigate bad roads, and we have ridden with them for many hours. As parents, we do all these things to ensure we have done the best to keep our child safe while on the road.
This concept is even more true when it comes to protecting your child as they learn how to mentally process content on social media platforms. Your child does not need complete control from the very beginning. They need to be slowly taught the dangers and warning signs of using any social media. They need their parent to walk through this stage with them.
Now, shifting specifically to TikTok. TikTok is know for how advanced it’s algorithm learns your preferences when it comes to content. If you like sports videos, it shows you more sports videos. This can be a positive, but there is a “break-in period” where it does not know any of your preferences. It is during this period that the app can be most dangerous. This content will be filled with bad language and very provocative videos. It is important as a parent you sit down with your child as they are beginning TikTok. Scroll past unwholesome content. Press the “like” button on videos that they do like. But MOST OF ALL, make sure you are comfortable with all the ‘Privacy and Safety’ and ‘Digital Wellbeing’ settings in their account.
In these two sections you, as the parent, have the power to influence the content your child is exposed to and who is allowed to see the content they post. Yes, there will still be some content that your student needs to stay away from. (Just like on all other social media platforms).
Even doing these things listed above, I would suggest a 13 year old is not ready for this type of social media platform. It takes responsibility and self-control to decide what they are going to allow to influence them. The downhill slope with this platform is very steep and very fast.
Our purpose as a student ministry is to “Help students take the next step in owning their faith”. We do not want a student to be so dependent on our student ministry that their faith crumbles when they graduate and get into the real world. Our Student ministry does have a TikTok and this account is ran by students, monitored by me. The purpose of this is twofold. 1.) This gives students a collective opportunity to learn how to share their faith to their peers through this platform. 2.) We are providing Christian content that hopefully replaces, at some level, the worldly content. Most students, inside and outside of church, are on TikTok and already consuming its content. We are doing our part to give them Christian content to watch.
Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.
- Romans 12:2
The hard truth is that one day your teenager will be an adult and have to make decisions concerning their faith and what they allow to influence them. While you have them under your roof it is your responsibility to prepare them for that kind of exposure. You also have the ability to regulate the timing and rate at which they are exposed to this content. Just because an app allows a 13 year old to make an account does not necessarily mean they should. On the other hand, it is not healthy for an 18 year old to get shell shock when their eyes are finally opened to people that have no regard for God and the “joy” they see in following the world.
A few suggestions in guiding your student through social media and TikTok are listed below:
You should have FULL access to their account at any time.
You should have a time period where you sit with them as they use the app.
Time-limits on social media should be enforced. (This can be adjusted in TikTok.)
A student should never be alone with their device for extended periods of time. Especially at night while going to bed.
Monitor who your teenager is following and who is following them.
Below are a couple of helpful articles that were shared to me by parents.
Parents’ Ultimate Guide to TikTok
TikTok Is A Pedophile Magnet And Unsafe For Kids, Warns Cyber Security Expert
Hopefully this helps you take the next step in discipling your teenager. Thank you for allowing me to minister to you and your family.
Danny Jackson
Hillcrest Baptist Church | Student Minister
Office: 409-384-3371
Email: dannyjackson@hbcjasper.com